12.11.2007

time, distance & kids make friendships hard to maintain

i think every parent would agree that having a child really causes you to loose touch with the outside world. you become consumed with your immediate family and life just seems to slip away and you begin to interact less with those you had grown so close too. my wife and have talked about this at great lengths and get pretty down when we think about all the friends we had and how close we were before we all had kids. it's pretty sad but unfortunately it seems to be a fact of life. if you want friendships once you have kids, you really have to work at it and the sad part is, if you don't work, you forget who your friends are. even if you don't mean to.

this past weekend two friends of mine and their wives drove up from houston to surprise me for my birthday. i've know one of these friends 16 years and the other 8 years. we still chat occasionally and see each other a couple of times a year but we were all so close before my wife and i moved to austin and then when we had calli it got worse.

i was completely shocked when they pulled up late friday night. when they walked through the door, it was as if nothing had ever changed. it felt really good to reconnect. calli latched on to all of them from the get go and it made me really sad as they drove away. calli was blowing them kisses and i started to think about the next time she would see them. i couldn't honestly tell myself when that would be. hell , we have friends here where we live that we hardly see much less 3.5 hours away. but i truly want to make an effort to keep these friends close. i have a pretty small family and she's going to need these extended aunts and uncles in her life. i know it's going to be tough with both my jobs and trying to match up schedules but in the end it's well worth it.

essential.